Misc.

No emotional post recently...I guess it's about time.

Every year about this time - well, exactly this time, I get a little sad. Today would have been my 9th wedding anniversary. It's also marks the 4th year since our separation and ultimate divorce. I guess the good news is that each year I get a little less angry, but the sadness never seems to go away.

Tomorrow (or today, I guess) will also be the first Halloween that I won't go trick-or-treating with Olivia. Her mom is taking her to a classmate's house to go out in their neighborhood. I wasn't invited, and I guess I understand. I don't put the parameters on divorce and how it looks to other people like some do. I guess I just want what's best for Olivia.

I hatched this crazy idea to do the NUE (National Ultra Endurance) series next year. It's a series of mountain bike races. Someone asked me how I plan to do that on no money and no time....I'll train as though I'm going to do it and worry about the logistics later. I freely admit that the only reason I'm racing mountain bikes is because it makes me feel good. It seems to be one of the few things I'm good at. Riding for long distances allows me to escape for a while and puts me in a place where I can really focus - something that is very hard for me in most of the other endeavors in my life.

I'm really just trying to enjoy some things in life, even though my stress levels are through the roof right now. Olivia and I have spent some really good time together. We are connecting well and she responds to me like every dad would want. It's something I've learned to not take for granted. There are parts of me in her that make me cringe, but she is a phenomenal little girl and I am very proud of her.

Hard to believe that about 6 weeks ago we were paying almost two dollars more for a gallon of gas. I wonder if the people that were so quick to blame George Bush for the increase in gas prices are now crediting him for the dramatic drop in prices? It's funny, that so close to the election people on the left want to treat this economic period of difficulty as though it is purely an American thing. Here's a wake up call - this is GLOBAL...Might as well throw every governmental official in every country out of office...unless, of course, you, like me, think that this problem was created by the CITIZENS, not the government.

I'm tired, and I'm going to go to bed. Actually, I'm going to "couch". I haven't slept in my bed in about a month. For some reason, I'm just sleeping better on the couch lately. Maybe it goes back to my last 5 or 6 years as a bachelor. When me and my brother lived together I slept almost every night on the couch. Don't know why - it just felt comfortable.

My buddy Bruce sent me some videos he took from Las Vegas on my 40th birthday trip today. They are unbelievably funny. I had tears rolling down my face from laughing. Good times indeed.